In an attempt to relate my cultic experience, I'll begin by describing
my pre-cult frame of mind.
I was an extremist, highly idealistic, a black and white thinker,
a dreamer, etc
I perceived society as an incomplete and dysfunctional
product of man. In many ways I still do, but that's beside the
point. The point is that I was a vulnerable youth looking for
I was a student at Santa Barbara City College. I had a hard time
taking school seriously. I thought there were "answers"
to be found elsewhere. It was only a matter of time until I would
run into the wrong influence.
I met him in a park. He was an older man who was equally dissatisfied
with a society of fallen men. He carried a Bible, called himself
a Prophet, and spouted words of wisdom to those who were willing
to listen. He berated those who disagreed with him, and befriended
those who didn't question his theology. As a general rule, he
was surrounded by vulnerable youths who knew no better. I myself
had a simple faith in God, and periodically read the Bible. Nevertheless,
I had little knowledge concerning the fundamental principals of
the Bible. This made me very vulnerable and receptive to his
interpretation. I was deeply impressed by his front of stability.
He lived on the street, free and careless, ate out of garbage
cans, (if he had to), and basically answered to no one, including
himself much less God.
In a matter of weeks, I had dropped out of school, moved out to
the beach, and embarked on what would be nine solid months of
I want to acknowledge the fact that man has performed atrocities
in the name of God throughout history. Nevertheless, this has
no bearing on the character of God, it rather solidifies the concept
that man has fallen, and continues in fallen ways.
Anyway, within a few months I became indoctrinated with his twisted
understanding of how to relate the teachings of the Bible to real
life, and I was slowly loosing the ability to think for myself.
I took on his, "us/them" mentality, and disconnected
myself with family and friends. I began to perceive any concern
from loved ones as a source of opposition. I met their concern
with stern defensiveness protecting the validity of this man and
This phenomenon of what is known as mind control can be described
by an experiment someone did using a frog. If a frog is placed
in a pot of boiling water, it will jump out. It that same frog
is placed in warm water as the heat is gradually increased, it
will remain in the pot till it boils to death. The point is,
is that we can rarely sense destruction when it builds gradually.
Encountering opposition at the beach, we got in a car and traveled
7,000 miles, from one end of the country to the other. East to
west, as well as north to south. The day's were grueling. Through
this man's constant anger and criticism, I had further lost the
ability to think, feel, and believe that I had the ability, much
less the right to make a decision. I became utterly dependent
I was constantly on the verge of what I considered to be, either
a spiritual breakthrough, or a nervous breakdown. The reasons
being that I had been constantly reminded of the severity of God
upon those who were disobedient. At the same time he would tell
me of rewards given to those who walked, "the road less traveled."
I began to think that everything he said was directly from God.
If I were to defy him, I would be in defiance of God. I interpreted
my misery as what had to be endured by those who wanted to please
We ended up in Chicago and lived with an old friend he knew 12
years ago. After a few months in the apartment, I was no longer
stable enough to bear the weight of this man's neurosis. I had
become so dependent, my dependency turned burdensome to him.
Ironic! To alleviate me from his presence, he suggested that
God might want me to go out into the streets of Chicago during
the coldest month of the year. Unquestioning, and penniless,
I would walk for hours, sometimes all through the night just to
keep from freezing to death. There was two feet of snow on the
ground, and a wind chill factor of below zero.
After 8 days of this reality, my parents and brother had flown
from Los Angeles to Chicaog after discovering my whereabouts from
a detective agency. They interceded, and with an exit counselor
drove me to an isolated cabin where we remained for one week.
During this time, I learned about techniques of mind control
and how they applied to my situation. The "Prophet"
turned out to be a sociopath. I awoke from the state of mind
control after six days of rigorous deprogramming sessions.
In conclusion, those who consider themselves immune to mind control,
are the most vulnerable. My hope is that society will pay more
attention to this phenomenon as a result of crises such as the
event in Waco Texas. Educate yourselves, and above all, don't
blame God for man's fallen ways.
There are some 2,500 known cults in the U.S. and they are on all
college campuses, street corners, banks etc. trying to recruit