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Personal Story of former member(Please note that the names of the people involved in this story have been changed to use only their first and sometimes, last initials to protect their privacy.)
The author is protected by her first initial.
On April 2, 1992 I became a part of the Doranda Blevins Multi-Age
Community. When I first moved in there was only one thing about
what went on that made me feel uncomfortable. This was the way
the religious services were conducted. They included Daronda
speaking in tongues, interpreting the Holy Spirits words, and
casting out demons. There were demons for everything imaginable
- from car problems to someone who simply did not like Daronda.
She would often times lay prostate of the floor moaning and weeping
uncontrollably. If a person were frustrated, angry, sad or depressed,
it was attributed to demonic activity. I had been raised Baptist
and all of this was new to me. Sometimes members of the group
would take turns sitting in the middle of the room in a chair
and everyone else would gather around to lay hands on that person
and cast the devils out or pray for healing. Daronda presented
herself as a very spiritual astute person who knew exactly what
it would take to reach heaven, and also as someone who could save
the world if it would just let her.
When I first moved in I stayed at 613 Meremec Station Road. R.D.
lived upstairs while D, B, and I stayed downstairs in the basement.
S.R. live next door in 611. At the time S.E. and A.B. still
had their own homes. Daronda lived in a condo she had occupied
for ten years in Carols Wood located in South County off of Lindberg.
There were many times that Daronda stayed upstairs at 613 however.
When I meved in I was allowed to have pictures of family and
friends, as well as receive phone calls from them. I was not
prohibited from watching TV nor was I told I could not listen
to the music of my choice.
One day a few weeks after I moved in the three of us girls were
told by Daronda that we could no longer read any fiction books
because they let the demon of fantasy in. WE could read instructional
books only. A short time following that we were informed that
any type of card game was evil, and that other games could be
played only with great discretion. A few weeks later television
too was prohibited. Not long after that, all music except Christian
was not allowed.
During all the time leading up to this point, subtle hints were
dropped by Daronda as well as by B. and D. that the only way to
ever get well was to cut all contact with family members and old
friends. Daronda would tell the same stories over and over again
about what trouble she would have to go through when either of
the girls decided to see their families. She said that their
families made them emotional basket cases, unable to function
in society. I began to know that I too, would be asked to cut
ties with family and friends.
At first, I tried to ignore the hints but that only resulted by
Daronda confronting me. I was left feeling like I did not have
any real choice in the matter. I was told over and again during
the confrontation haw horrible my parents were, how they did not
want me, they did not love me, and if I were left to them I would
die. I was made to know that if I did not follow the "Healing
program" - I was out - at the same time, I was told that
Daronda did want and love me and that she was the only one anywhere
who did. I was constantly reminded of the years I had spent living
in and out of friends houses and living on the street. It was
told to everyone that I did not have anyone who wanted me except
Daronda.
One night following a confrontation by Daronda about my giving
up my family, us three girls were instructed to go to my room
and clean it out. Nic-nacs, pictures, stuffed animals, -- and
anything else that gave a bad feeling - were boxed up. Daronda
took the box and told me she would keep it safe until it was okay
for me to have it again. Some time later when I asked S.E. about
where it was she told me it had been thrown away. Following this
particular confrontation, I was instructed to write a letter to
my parents informing them of my desires, and to tell my best friend
V.M. that I did not want to talk to her for awhile. No certain
times were ever put on anything, it was always just said, "until
I am well." When I did not immediately follow through with
the letter to my family, I was confronted again. This time I
wrote a letter. Daronda read the letter and took it to make a
copy. She said she would mail it for me.
About five months after I moved in S. was told he had to move
because he would not conform himself to Daronda's rules for healing.
Around this same time Daronda moved out of her condo altogether
and moved into the center. She had D. move into the center with
her under the pretext that her and B.'s dependency on one another
needed to be broke up. She also said that this would be the summer
that D. would, "get her own identity." Every time I
had the chance to see Dawn that summer, she was either sad or
depressed. She was constantly being confronted and put down by
Daronda. She was told that she had a nothing personality and
that she was basically a non-person. Daronda deliberately set
out to show no emotion toward D. except contempt for who she was
and scorn. D. at this time was confused and hurting, she thought
that Daronda did not love her anymore and she became more determined
than ever to do exactly what it was she thought Daronda wanted
her to do and be exactly what Daronda wanted her to be. Many
times D. expressed to me her terrible fear that Daronda did not
like her or lover her anymore when a confrontation took place.
Each time D. was confronted she became more determined to please
Daronda - the more she did to please the more she got confronted
- and so she set out to please again. This cycle continued on
and on - it still does today.
Many times I was told a story about D.'s deliverance. D. herself
described it to me. She said that she sat on the floor in the
middle of the group. Everyone took turns stripping her down.
They told her that she touhgt she was big stuff but she was not
shit. Her walk was mimicked by Daronda, and she was told she
was sluty. She was told she was mean and hateful and that she
tried to seduce every man who walked in the room. She was called
names and any bad quality they felt she had was described to her.
She was mocked and made fun of. D. told me that at some point
she began to realize she had to get out of there - she also said
that she decided she might as well kill herself since going back
ou into the world would be the same thing. At the times the thoughts
came to her she told them to the group and she was confronted
even harder. The deliverance process took hours. The result
was that most of the demons D. had been possessed by were driven
out.
At the end of the summer of 1992, D. moved back into 613. During
her stay at the center, S. sold her house, gave the money to the
center, began fixing up the basement of 611, and moved temporarily
into the upstairs of 613. Shortly after the basement was finished
she moved into the basement - it had been converted into an apartment.
Not long following this A.'s house was sold and she too gave
the money to the center. The upstairs of 611 was fixed up and
A. moved in.
About a year after I moved in, J.I. moved in. When he first come
he would go out and do things with us girls. Sometimes we would
go to the park of he would just come over to the house and we
would sit around and talk. After J. had been there for about
three months, we were told that he could not be around us girls
anymore. Daronda said that all three of us were man haters and
that we mistreated J. and caused his healing to regress. At one
time a few months after the whole group was at the farm in Arkansas,
Daronda started to confront us girls about J. She kept us up
until three in the morning. The confrontation had started around
eight. She told D. that she tried to seduce J. She told B. that
she exploited J. She told me that I was basically hateful toward
him and that I provoked him to anger. She went on and on about
how we could not be trusted with any man. She told us that of
she lost J. it would be our faults for treating him so terrible.
That if he left and ended up dead it would be on us. After that
none of us were allowed to even speak to J. Daronda began to
take J. with her everywhere and never let him out of her sight.
If she went to Arkansas, so did J. If she went to the store,
so did J. Anywhere she went she took J. along. In the beginning,
J. stayed at the center with Daronda. Eventually, a condo next
door to Daronda came up for sale, it was bought, and J. was moved
in. Every morning he was to come straight toher condo after he
was dressed. There were many times that J. would get sick of
Daronda constantly confronting him and he would go off on her.
He would tell her she was crazy and needed help. He called hern
ames and physically threatened her. Finally, she brought the
problem up with Dr. Krojanker, and J. was put on medicine called
Buspar. When he took it regularly like he should he was under
control. If he skipped it or quit taking it, he would start to
rebel again. She took control of it and administered it herself
to guarantee he was taking it.
About a month after J. moved in S.H. came to stay with us. She
was presented as a little girl who had many problems, mostly with
her mother and she needs lots of help.. Daronda told S. basically
the same thing she told the rest of us - that her mother could
not take care of her, that she was an unfit parent, and that she
was the only person in the world who could possibly make her into
a functioning person someday. All of us were always told that
it could take years and maybe never would all the damage our parents
had done to us be reversed.
Six months after S. came S.G. and J.G. came to stay at the center.
Their family had been coming to the Daronda for counseling for
a few years. Both of the kids had been doing poorly in school
and Daronda convinced the parents that if they let her home school
them, she could improve their grades as well as their interest
in school. J.G. stayed for one semester and decided he wanted
to go home. S.G. decided to stay and is still here. By the time
the semester was up she had bonded with S. and had been convinced
by Daronda that she too could find health and happiness only through
Daronda.
Never at any time did Daronda mention any of us going home. She
talked of years down the road and what parts she expected each
of us to play in the building up a place where lots of kids could
receive the benefits we were receiving.
Shortly after J. came to the center, an old client named W.W.
called Daronda and asked if she could take care of his father
C. She said yes, and C. came. J. was the basic care giver with
him. After he had been there about seven months, he began to
get sick. He was in and out of the hospital and rapidly lost
control over his bathing, clothing and bathroom skills. Shortly
before Christmas, while C. was in the hospital, he contacted staff
disease and was put in a nursing home. On Christmas Eve he passed
away.
In October of 1993, about five months after C. came to the center,
S. received a phone call concerning her elderly father. He was
in bad shape and needed help. Daronda sent S. to Florida to get
him. He came back and was in our care for about a month when
he developed pneumonia and was hospitalized. From there he rapidly
got worse. At the same time C. was dying A.R.(S's father) was
dying also. Just two days after C. died, A.R. died in his sleep
while he was in my care. He left S. a very great sum of money
in the area of half million dollars - all of which she turned
over to the center before I left.
About two or three weeks after we held the services for A.'s funeral,
S. began to act differently. At first, the group just thought
it was because she had just lost her father. Later, Daronda decided
it was something more. S. seemed to be distancing herself from
the group. She was isolating herself. Finally, one day Daronda
began to confront S about her behavior. This confrontation was
to last altogether about three weeks. It did not take place all
at once, but every time S. saw Daronda there were hours spent
with Daronda confronting her. If the group were around everyone
was instructed to use group dynamics to confront her. During
this time, nearing the end of three weeks, Dr. Krojanker came
for his regular monthly visit. Daronda decided that S. should
have a session with him. She of course included herself as part.
At that time, a friend of Daronda named S.M. was coming on the
days Dr. K. was there to sit in on sessions in order to get hours
in for his degree in counseling - so he too was there. During
this time, Daronda suggested that role playing be done. Daronda
played S.'s mother and S.M. was a mediator. In the course of
the role playing, the topic somehow turned to Daronda and the
way she treated S. S. at that time said she felt scorned and
belittled by Daronda. She felt that Daronda had a control problem
and was mean in order to get her way. Later that afternoon the
rest of us went to the center for a group session with Dr. K.
When we arrived we were informed that Daronda would not be joining
us as usual because she had an extremely hard day and could not
cope with anything else. The groups session lasted about two
hours. All of this time Daronda stayed in her office with the
door closed by herself. When Dr. K. left, she came out and told
us that S. had betrayed her and the whole group. She told us
S. embarrassed and humiliated her. She also added that it would
be all right though because everyone including S.M. and Dr. K.
knew how untrustworthy and not credible S. was. The rest of that
evening was spent with the group sitting around discussing S.
as if she were not even in the room. The next day was a Sunday
and we all gathered at the center in the morning for a church
service. Talk of the Bible never occurred that day. The whole
time was spent with Daronda raging and screaming at S. At one
point Daronda screamed, "If you want to act like a dog, get
on your knees-get on your knees now!" At this point, she
grabbed S.'s hair and began to spank her with her hand. The whole
time she was screaming. When she stepped away, S. got up and
ran into Daronda's counseling room. Daronda followed. From the
other room we could hear Daronda yelling and S. crying. Daronda
was saying things like, "So the big S. can cry can she?"
and "You want scorn? I'll give you scorn!" "What
do you think you're crying for. I'm the one who you betrayed!"
At some point Daronda screamed at the rest of us that she needed
help. Some of us went into the room. S. was backed into a corner
and Daronda was in her face pulling her hair and asking S if she
wanted to hit her daring her to do so. After about another hour
it somehow came up that the Holy Spirit wanted all S.'s money
turned over to the center. After S. said she would do this, Daronda
cheerfully laughed and acted like everything was all right. She
looked at S. and said that she had known that there was something
else wrong with S. besides just her father's death. Starting
the next day, S. began to transfer her assets to the company and
has been ever since. Sometimes S. still does not transfer something
fast enough and Daronda will ask her if she wants another episode
like before. If usually happened right away after that.
There are meny times I can recall Daronda going on rampages that
lasted for hours. Anytime the whole group was together, she found
something to rebuke us for. She would tell us that she could
not believe that there were other people in the world who acted
the way we did and that we were all power hungry sickies. Always
she told us how we were so sick we could not function in the real
world. Whenever there was a big issue she wanted solved, she
would speak in tongues during a service and then interpret. Always
the message was that Daronda was doing what was right in the Holy
Spirit's eyes, and that we should obey her in everything. Sometimes
she acted like she hated every one of us during one of her tirades.
The worst ones were on Sunday mornings and while we were all
t the farm. On the Sundays we all had gathered to work on a Bible
study program she had written. She had asked a question and when
she turned to me for response, I did not answer exactly the way
she instructed me to. She went into a rage and said that our
biggest problem was that we did not know how to follow instructions
and she was tired of Satan using us to attack her. She used that
line A LOT. She went on for a couple of hours about this particular
issue.
Another instance took place about six months back. B. and D.
had gone to the farm by themselves to pick J.B. (a 19-year-old
that was coming to live there). They spent the night by themselves.
Just before it started getting dark, they went outside to burn
trash. While they were doing this an aerosal can exploded in
the can and caught B.'s shirt and hair on fire. The left side
of her face was burned and needed treatment. Also during their
stay at the farm B. had gone to the garden and picked some rhubarb
to make a pie. A few days after the girls were back home, Daronda
called D. at the childcare. She told her she felt like B. was
doing something to let the demons in. She told D. that she was
going to confront B. big time. She told D. to tell me and to
discuss all the things we had seen B. doing wrong. She also said
she did not want B. to know what she was going to do. She said
that she wanted everyone to get B. at once and she wanted B. to
think that everyone else had been conspiring against her. The
next day after everyone got to the center, Daronda started to
confront B. She accused B. of trying to compete with her and
of sabotaging Daronda in the cooking area. She also told B. that
she felt that she must have done something wrong for God to allow
Satan to attack her with the fire. B. was instructed that she
was no longer allowed to be in charge on any meals until she earned
it.
Anytime Daronda made anything for the group, there was a confrontation
if everyone did not compliment it. If she made a cobbler and
someone did not eat it - she confronted. If she wrote an article
and someone did not read it - she confronted. A few months ago
she made a professional singing tape. She made it known that
she expected everyone to listen to her tape and her tape alone.
If she came around the houses and any music besides hers was
playing, she would be mad. She always said this was just another
way Satan had of using us. We were all so jealous of her and
wanted her power so much that we let Satan use is against her.
Over and over we were all told every time we saw her that we were
basically losers and demon used sickies. We could not make it
in the world and would die without her intervention. She also
claimed herself to be the only one anywhere who knew exactly what
the Holy Spirit wanted. If someone else in the group would say
that they felt the Holy Spirit wanted them to do something, she
would pick it apart and tell that person it was not God that told
them, but Satan.
She often said she would not follow anyone else's lead because
no one else knew what she knew. No one was allowed outside after
dark because she said Satan hated us all because of her time we
could not even buy our own clothes, make-up or other supplies.
She would pick out all of our clothes for us. One time she went
and got a whole bunch of hair bows and said she liked to see us
girls in them. At that time D. had very short hair and looked
ridiculous wearing the,. But she wore them anyway because this
is what Daronda wanted.
Daronda was very good at finding what things us kids did not like
about our parents and magnifying it to the Nth degree. With everyone
of us it was different, but the basic solution was the same -
stay away from them or they would destroy us.